The White Christmas and other Merry Christmas Plays

SCENE: _A room in_ FATHER FRITZ'S _house. Doors at R. and L. Small table down L. with three chairs around it. Sofa down R. Easy chair down C. Lighted lamp on table. Window at rear._ DUMPLING _is seated on a rocking-horse at rear C._ GRANDPA _stands by him helping him rock it._ TOOTSY _is on a rocking-horse at L. front, with_ FATHER _and_ MOTHER _helping her rock it._ SNOOKUMS _is on a baby rocking-horse at R. front, with_ GRANDMA _and_ NURSE MAID _in attendance. Very little furniture on stage. If the rocking-horses are not easy to get,_ DUMPLING _and_ TOOTSY _may be astride of sticks with horses' heads._

_Curtain rises to bright music._

ALL (_sing_).

HOP, HOP, HOP!

[Music illustration:

1. Hop, hop, hop! Nim-ble as a top, Where 'tis smooth and where 'tis sto-ny, Trudge a-long, my lit-tle po-ny, Hop, hop, hop, hop, hop! Nim-ble as a top.

2. Whoa, whoa, whoa! How like fun you go! Ver-y well, my lit-tle po-ny, Safe's our jaunt tho' rough and sto-ny, Spare, spare, spare, spare, spare! Sure e-nough we're there.

3. Here, here, here! Yes, my po-ny dear; Now with oats and hay I'll treat you, And with smiles will ev-er greet you, Po-ny, po-ny dear! Yes, my po-ny dear.]

Dumpling. (_dismounting_) Whoa, there, Jimmie! Oh, Grandpa, I do love my pony. It's the best of all my presents.

Grandpa. Well, it's time you put him in his stall.

Tootsy. (_dismounting_) I'm going to call my pony after Mr. ----. (_Insert the name of some well known man._) 'Cause he looks just like him.

Grandma. (_helping_ SNOOKUMS _from pony_) And what are you going to call your pony, Snookums?

Snookums. Going to call him Elizabeth, after you, Grandma.

Grandma. (_kisses her_) That's my baby!

Mother. Grandma, we'd better get our hats and coats. It's nearly time for the car to be after us.

Father. Come, Grandpa. It's nearly eight o'clock.

Grandpa. But I don't like to leave the children.

Dumpling. And we don't like to have you leave us, either. My, this has been the grandest Christmas day I've ever seen.

Mother. Come, Grandma. (_Exits L. with_ GRANDMA.)

Grandpa. Come, children. (_They gather around him._) I'm glad you've had such a happy Christmas. You got everything you wanted, didn't you?

Tootsy. Yes, everything. My, I wish Christmas would come every day.

Dumpling. Tell us the story about old Saint Nick, Grandpa.

Grandpa. Do you want to hear that old chestnut again?

Children. Oh, yes, yes!

GRANDPA (_takes_ SNOOKUMS _on his lap, the other children stand by his knee._)

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse; The stockings were hung by the chimney with care, In hopes that Saint Nicholas soon would be there. The children were nestled all snug in their beds, While visions of sugar-plums danced through their heads; Grandma in her kerchief and I in my cap, Had just settled our brains for a long winter's nap,-- When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter, I sprang from my bed to see what was the matter. Away to the window I flew like a flash, Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.

When what to my wondering eyes would appear But a wee little sleigh and eight little reindeer, With a wee little driver, so lively and quick, I knew in a moment it must be Saint Nick. More rapid than eagles his reindeers they came, And he whistled and shouted and called them by name: "Now, Dasher! Now, Dancer! Now, Prancer and Vixen! On, Comet! On, Cupid! On, Donder and Blitzen! To the top of the porch, to the top of the wall! Now, dash away, dash away, dash away, all."

So up to the housetop the reindeer they flew, With a sleigh full of toys, and Saint Nicholas, too. As I drew in my head and was turning around, Down the chimney Saint Nicholas came with a bound. He was dressed all in red from his head to his foot, And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot. His eyes, how they twinkled! His dimples how merry! His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry. He had a broad face and a little round belly That shook when he laughed, like a bowl full of jelly.

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread. He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work And filled all the stockings; then turned with a jerk, And laying his finger aside of his nose, And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose. He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle, And away they all flew like the down of a thistle; But I heard him exclaim e'er he drove out of sight: "Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!"

--_Clement C. Moore._

Children. Oh, that was just lovely.

Tootsy. I just wish I could see him. Just once!

Dumpling. And so do I. I'm going to catch him some Christmas Eve.

Snookums. Me, too!

_Enter from L._, MOTHER _and_ GRANDMA, _wearing winter coats and hats. They carry coats and hats for_ FATHER _and_ GRANDPA.

Mother. Here, Grandpa, put on your coat and hat, or we'll be late for the dinner. (_Helps him._)

Grandpa. I'd rather stay here and talk to the children.

Father. (_putting on his coat_) But Aunt Clara is expecting us.

Grandma. And the auto is at the door.

Grandpa. Dumpling, are you sure you got everything you wanted for Christmas?

Dumpling. I can't think of anything else.

Grandpa. If you didn't, and if all three of you children can agree on anything else, it shall be yours if money can buy it.

Tootsy. Money can buy everything, can't it, Grandpa?

Grandpa. No, my dear, not quite everything.

Dumpling. But suppose we wish for something that money can't buy?

Grandpa. I'd try to get it for you some other way.

Tootsy. How, Grandpa; how?

Grandpa. Why, I'd tell the Wishing Man. He'd get it for you.

Grandma. Come along, John; don't put such nonsense in the children's heads.

Father. We must hurry along to Aunt Clara's, children. But this is Christmas night. You may all stay up tonight just as long as you wish.

Dumpling. Oh, can we? Can we?

Mother. Yes. Cecelia will look after you. Cecelia?

Nurse Maid. Of course I will, mum.

Mother. Come along, now. We must hurry. (_Kisses the children and goes out R. with_ GRANDMA, GRANDPA _and_ FATHER.)

Tootsy. (_dancing around_) Oh, we can stay up just as long as we wish! Goody, goody! Why that is the very best gift of all.

Nurse Maid. Now you children be good, and if you want me, call out. I'll be down in the kitchen with the cook. (_Goes out at L._)

Dumpling. Now we're left all alone.

Tootsy. I don't see why Aunt Clara couldn't have invited us to her dinner party, too.

Snookums. (_playing with doll_) Snookums likes dinner party.

Dumpling. It's 'cause we ain't big enough.

Tootsy. My, I wisht I was a great, great, great big girl.

Dumpling. There, that's a wish that money can't buy.

Tootsy. Grandpa said he'd get us anything we wished for.

Dumpling. What do you wish, Snookums?

Snookums. Wish Grandpaw would come home.

Tootsy. I know a real good wish. I wish it were Christmas every day. Don't you, Dumpling?

Dumpling. No, I don't. We'd have to have a present and a tree and a turkey and plum pudding every day of our lives. We'd get awfully tired of it after a while. Just think, we'd have to give away about a million presents every year.

Tootsy. I'll tell you what I really do wish.

Dumpling. What?

Tootsy. I wish we could do just like grown up folks do. I wish I was the biggest little girl in all the world.

Dumpling. And I wish so, too. I wish we were just awfully, awfully, awfully big--and then we could go to Aunt Clara's dinner party, and everywhere.

Snookums. Me wish me was great big Snookums.

Tootsy. But money couldn't buy that wish, Dumpling.

Dumpling. No, that's right. But Grandpa said if he couldn't buy our wish he'd get it some other way.

Tootsy. How could he get it?

Dumpling. He said he'd tell the Wishing Man.

Tootsy. My, I wonder if there really is such a person!

Dumpling. I don't know. But I'd like to see him if there is.

Tootsy. I'll make a rhyme.

Good Mr. Wishing Man, how do you do? If there is such a person, we'd like to see you!

Dumpling. If you come from afar, if you come from near, Good Mr. Wishing Man, appear, appear!

_The_ WISHING MAN _rolls out from under the table, rises, faces the three children, arms akimbo._

Wishing Man. (_after a pause, drawls_) Well?

DUMPLING _and_ TOOTSY (_frightened, down R._). Well? (_They look at each other, pause, then repeat._) Well!

Snookums. (_comes in front of them, stands facing the_ WISHING MAN, _arms akimbo_) Well?

Wishing Man. Well, I'm here.

Dumpling. Who's here?

Wishing Man. Why, _I_ am here. You said you would like to see me and so I have come. _I'm_ here.

Tootsy. Are you the Wishing Man?

Wishing Man. That's my name. (_Sings to the tune of "Wearing of the Green." He sings briskly, shaking head in time and dancing a step or two._)

I'm the friend of all the children, And I'll help you if I can, Just tell me what your wishes are, For I'm the Wishing Man. I have wishbones on my fingers, I have myst'ry in my eyes, My clothes are trimmed with horseshoes, And they're stained with magic dyes. My pocket's full of rabbits' feet, And clover leaves and charms, For luck I've got a big black cat All tattooed on my arms, I'm a friend of all the children, And I'll help you if I can, So tell me what your wishes are-- For I'm the Wishing Man.

I come from a distant country Away up near the pole, But the things that I am telling you, You mustn't tell a soul. I know every witch and goblin, And if you would believe! I have fortunes in my pocket-book, And wonders up my sleeve. When any little boy or girl Says, "Wishing Man, appear!" I jump right up from underneath, And here I am, my dear! I'm a friend of all the children, And I'll help you if I can, So tell me what your wishes are-- For I'm the Wishing Man.

Dumpling. And can you really grant us anything we wish for?

Wishing Man. I can, if it's a good wish--and if you all agree on the same thing.

Tootsy. Anything in the wide, wide world?

Wishing Man. Well, pretty nearly anything. Would you like some new toys?

Tootsy. Oh, no, thank you. This is Christmas, you know, and we got ever so many toys.

Snookums. Ever so many toys.

Wishing Man. I don't see what you called me for. You seem to have everything you want.

Dumpling. Oh, no, we haven't. We've made a wish, and we're all agreed on it.

Wishing Man. Are you sure it's a good wish?

Dumpling. Oh, yes, it's an awful good wish. You see, we want to be great big children so we can stay up late at night and go to Aunt Clara's dinner parties. That's our wish. We want to be the biggest children there are anywhere.

Wishing Man. (_laughs heartily_) Oh, ho, ho, ho! That's the funniest wish I ever heard since I've been in the wishing business. So you want to be the very biggest children there are anywhere, do you?

Tootsy. Yes, sir; that's just what we want. I want to be a great, big, tall little girl.

Wishing Man. (_laughing_) A great, big tall little girl, hey?

Dumpling. And I want to be a great, big, big, _big_ little boy.

Wishing Man. Oh, a big, _big_, BIG little boy, hey?

Snookums. And so do I.

Wishing Man. And so do you, hey?

Children. Yes, sir; that is our wish.

Wishing Man. Well, I'll have to see if I can accommodate you. It's a pretty big job, you know.

Tootsy. You said you could give us anything we wished for.

Wishing Man. But I didn't think you'd wish for anything like that.

Dumpling. That's the only thing we want, Mr Wishing Man.

Wishing Man. (_rubbing his chin and speaking thoughtfully_) Well, now--let me see. I'm afraid it's too big a job for me. In the first place I haven't any marble.

Children. Marble?

Wishing Man. Yes. In order to make you grow and grow and grow, you'll have to stand on marble.

Tootsy. We have a marble-top table in the front hall.

Dumpling. Oh, yes. And we can all stand on top of the table.

Wishing Man. But I have to stand here by the open window.

Tootsy. Well, we can go in there and leave the door open. You can stay here and make our wish come true. Come on, Dumpling.

Wishing Man. Wait a minute, wait a minute. Are you all of you sure you want to be made into great big, big little children?

Children. Yes, all of us.

Wishing Man. All right. If that's your wish, it's no business of mine. Go out in the front hall and climb on the marble-top table and I'll see what I can do for you.

Tootsy. Oh, come on, quick, Dumpling, before he changes his mind. (_Runs out R. with_ DUMPLING _and_ SNOOKUMS, _the latter taking very long strides._)

Wishing Man. It's a very foolish wish, but maybe they'll be satisfied if I make them the biggest children on earth. (_Throws back curtains at the window._) I'll see what I can do.

Dumpling. (_outside_) I'm standing up on the table now.

Wishing Man. Hickety, kickety, setting sun, (_Making mysterious passes._) Thunder, lightning, flash of a gun! Let him grow bigger, it won't be much fun; Hickety, kickety, number one!

(_Lights flash out, then on again, then out. Low rumbles of thunder heard. Lights on again, then off. Loud crash outside._)

Tootsy. Now it's my turn. I'm on the table.

Wishing Man. Witchery, twitchery, kangaroo, Thunder and lightning, Kalamazoo! Lengthen her, strengthen her, rip, bazoo, Make her a giantess, number two!

(_Lightning and thunder as before._)

Snookums. (_outside_) Now, Mr. Wishing Man, I'm on the table.

Wishing Man. That's the Baby Snookums. Very well, little Snookie Ookums! I'll change you into the biggest baby on earth.

Rumpety, thumpety, Kankakee, Lengthen him out to six foot three! The biggest baby we ever did see, Rumpety, thumpety, number three!

(_Same noises as before, only louder._)

_Enter_ NURSE MAID _from L._

Nurse Maid. Goodness, gracious! Is it a tornado or an earthquake? (_Sees_ WISHING MAN.) Oh! (_Screams loudly._) And who are you? Murder! Thieves! Robbers! Where's me children? Where's little Dumpling and Tootsy and Baby Snookums? (_Fast, loud music._)

Wishing Man. (_yells_) Where are your children?

_Enter_ BIG DUMPLING, BIG TOOTSY _and_ BIG SNOOKUMS. _They join hands and dance around at R._

Wishing Man. There they are. There are little Dumpling and Tootsy and Baby Snookums.

(NURSE MAID _looks at children, screams loudly, throws up her arms and faints in a chair at L. of stage._ WISHING MAN _stands at C. with arms akimbo, laughing at her. The three big children dance in a circle at R._)

CURTAIN.