The Double-Dealer: A Comedy

[_To them_] LORD TOUCHWOOD, LORD FROTH, SIR PAUL PLYANT, _and_ BRISK.

Lord Touch. Out upon't, nephew. Leave your father-in-law and me to maintain our ground against young people!

Mel. I beg your lordship's pardon. We were just returning.

Sir Paul. Were you, son? Gadsbud, much better as it is. Good, strange! I swear I'm almost tipsy; t'other bottle would have been too powerful for me,--as sure as can be it would. We wanted your company, but Mr. Brisk--where is he? I swear and vow he's a most facetious person, and the best company. And, my Lord Froth, your lordship is so merry a man, he, he, he.

Lord Froth. Oh, foy, Sir Paul, what do you mean? Merry! Oh, barbarous! I'd as lieve you called me fool.

Sir Paul. Nay, I protest and vow now, 'tis true; when Mr. Brisk jokes, your lordship's laugh does so become you, he, he, he.

Lord Froth. Ridiculous! Sir Paul, you're strangely mistaken, I find champagne is powerful. I assure you, Sir Paul, I laugh at nobody's jest but my own, or a lady's, I assure you, Sir Paul.

Brisk. How? how, my lord? what, affront my wit! Let me perish, do I never say anything worthy to be laughed at?

Lord Froth. Oh, foy, don't misapprehend me; I don't say so, for I often smile at your conceptions. But there is nothing more unbecoming a man of quality than to laugh; 'tis such a vulgar expression of the passion; everybody can laugh. Then especially to laugh at the jest of an inferior person, or when anybody else of the same quality does not laugh with one--ridiculous! To be pleased with what pleases the crowd! Now when I laugh, I always laugh alone.

Brisk. I suppose that's because you laugh at your own jests, i'gad, ha, ha, ha.

Lord Froth. He, he, I swear though, your raillery provokes me to a smile.

Brisk. Ay, my lord, it's a sign I hit you in the teeth, if you show 'em.

Lord Froth. He, he, he, I swear that's so very pretty, I can't forbear.

Care. I find a quibble bears more sway in your lordship's face than a jest.

Lord Touch. Sir Paul, if you please we'll retire to the ladies, and drink a dish of tea to settle our heads.

Sir Paul. With all my heart. Mr. Brisk, you'll come to us, or call me when you joke; I'll be ready to laugh incontinently.