Eileen monologue — The Straw

Then I want to say--I know your secret. You don't love me--Isn't that it? (Murray _groans._) Sssh! It's all right, dear. You can't help what you don't feel. I've guessed you didn't--right along. And I've loved you--such a long time now--always, it seems. And you've sort of guessed--that I did--didn't you? No, don't speak! I'm sure you've guessed--only you didn't want to know--that--did you?--when you didn't love me. That's why you were lying--but I saw, I knew! Oh, I'm not blaming you, darling. How could I--never! You mustn't look so--so frightened. I know how you felt, dear. I've--I've watched you. It was just a flirtation for you at first. Wasn't it? Oh, I know. It was just fun, and---- Please don't look at me so. I'm not hurting you, am I? I wouldn't for worlds, dear--you know--hurt you! And then afterwards--you found we could be such good friends--helping each other--and you wanted it to stay just like that always, didn't you?--I know--and then I had to spoil it all--and fall in love with you--didn't I? Oh, it was stupid--I shouldn't--I couldn't help it, you were so kind and--and different--and I wanted to share in your work and--and everything. I knew you wouldn't want to know I loved you--when you didn't--and I tried hard to be fair and hide my love so you wouldn't see--and I did, didn't I, dear? You never knew till just lately--maybe not till just to-day--did you?--when I knew you were going away so soon--and couldn't help showing it. You never knew before, did you? Did you?